Fear is something that is always constant in my life. I am always afraid of everything I want to do, it limits me to not do my best in that thing. I am fearful of love, of what might happen of I give in, of what might happen if I don’t give in, of what it would bring, of if it would change me, I am fearful of life, of what I have the potential to do and not to do, of if I will every reach that potential, of if I made the right decisions in life or not, of when it will all just come crashing down, I am fearful of myself, of the things that go through my mind, of the things I can do and can’t do, of the things I want for myself and those I don’t want, of wanting to be accepted for who I am and not who I pretend to be. I am afraid of my fears.
Then I asked myself why would I continue to let fear run my life for me, I will always be scared anyways unless I do something about it, it will not be managed. So I got researching and reading and I find a book that helped me know that I act the way I do because of my temperament. Temperament is the combination of inherited traits. It is from our mind or emotional center which is our heart which then combines with our other human characteristics to produce our basic makeup of who we are. It is our temperament that makes us outgoing and extroverted or shy and introverted.
I love the way he distinguished between temperament, character and personally. He said that temperament is the combination of inborn traits that subconsciously affect man’s behavior. Character is the real you. It is the result of your natural temperament modified by your childhood, education, basic attitude, beliefs, principles and motivations. While personality is the outward expression of ourselves, which may or may not be the same as out character, depending on how genuine we are to ourselves. Then he divided the temperament into four, which are sanguine, choleric, melancholy and phlegmatic. This four temperament can be put into two groups which are the sanguine and choleric are for the extrovert while the melancholy and phlegmatic are for the introvert. But also a person can have more than one combination of temperament but will always have a primary one. I am an introvert which I later found out in the book that I am a phlegmelchlor (phlegmatic, melancholy and choleric) and the major weakness I have is FEAR. I will put the name of the author of the book and tittle at the end of my writting in case you want to read the book ( I say read the book and better understanding yourself, don’t have to agree with all he said but I believe he talked about a lot of relevant things to better understand yourself)
Fear been a cruel taskmaster which inhibits every area of ones life’s. For this in its grip, it becomes the most powerful force in our life and it affects everything we do. This is how fear is in my life, but I have had enough of it and I am learning to manage it. I have been wanting to start a blog, publish my writings and many things I wish to do but because of fear and worry I did not do it, but no more because I have learned how to overcome my fear by learning to live without fear, worry and anxiety and the key is to learn to live with faith, be it faith in the God you worship, the universe, yourself or all of them. I for one am having faith in myself, by not justifying fear, removing the things that make me fearful in my life away, by been my own motivation and learning more things that motivate me and by repeating or retaking my step any time I become fearful and now it is becoming a habit. Don’t think you will do this once and if you fail and are still fearful it did not work no, what you do is if it fails you start again and before you know it you are not as afraid as you were before. I am an example to this because here I am writing this for you that helped me to help you. If I was still afraid I would not be writing this and I would not be publishing it.
I belief we are our own downfall and uprise in life. If you don’t like the way you feel everyday or the things that are going on in the life, you have the power and will to change it, but don’t assume because you want the change and don’t put in action to change it you will get anywhere, you won’t. All you will be is a town crier who only says things and not do anything about it. I know it is not easy for us to leave what we are comfortable in be it suffering or enjoyment, but we have to do something if you don’t like the way your life is going and it is never to late to be what you always want to be or know you can be. A step taken from where you are is it known as a step, a small action is still known as action. So no matter how small your progress is it is still a progress and before you know it will be an achievement.
I hope this helps someone. Thanks for reading.
Book: Tim Lahaye – why you act the way you do.